First dates are always a little bit scary, and everyone gets those first date jitters whether they admit it or not. It’s that feeling of ‘butterflies’ in your belly, slightly shaky hands, checking yourself out in the mirror at least ten times before you even leave the house. It happens to the most confident of people – you are after all, meeting someone who could be a big part of your life, whether it’s for a short period of time or for the long haul.
The end of a first date can often be the trickiest part for many people. Whether you’ve had a nice time or not, the question pops up: do you want to see them again, or was one date enough? And no matter what your answer is, what are you going to do about it? Do you wait for them to make a move, or be confident and forward with what you’re looking for? Do you let them down gently, or say you had a nice time and flee into the night?
We’ve put together a few tips to make sure you’re ready for anything next time you head out on a first date.
You’re just not that into them
The date was fine and they were fine, but you just didn’t click, you know? Maybe they were rude, or self-absorbed, or had a bunch of qualities that you just couldn’t get on board with. You’ll probably know by the end of one date whether you want to see someone again, and if you don’t, it’s important to do them a favour and cut them loose straight away. Don’t leave them hanging, and don’t pull a ‘ghost’! Just gently let them know that you had a nice time but you would rather be friends, or that you aren’t interested in going on another date. Don’t use any ‘maybes’ or ‘possibly,’ and make sure you’re firm. Whenever there’s room for indecision, things can get tricky!
Uh Oh, this may be the one
Hooray! You had a great time and you clicked on some sort of level. You want to explore things further, and get to know the other person more. It’s always a great feeling, but it can be confusing if you’re not sure how to approach the idea of a second date, or if you don’t know whether the other person feels the same. Our advice is to just be upfront, and let them know that you are interested. Don’t play hard to get, or pretend you aren’t interested just in case they aren’t – you won’t be doing anyone any favours! Make it obvious, send all the right signals, and go in for a cheeky kiss if you’re feeling it.
A little column A, a little column B?
That’s totally fine, too. Don’t stress yourself out too much, and remember that there’s no pressure to decide straight away – even if it feels like there is! See if you can figure out whether they are interested in taking it further or not, and then let them know that you’ll stay in touch. Take a day or two to mull it over and then send them a message letting them know what you have decided.
At PMM and Associates, we are professional matchmakers who are experts in relationships, dating, and all the ‘in between’ stuff – everything that happens between starting to date and finding your ideal partner. Why not get in touch with us to chat about what you’re looking for in a partner, make sure your next first date is worth it.
