If you’re dreading the Christmas chaos full of rom-coms and mistletoe then this blog has something for you…
Whether you’re newly single or have been searching for love all year, drowning your sorrows in eggnog is never the answer. I know this season can be difficult and you might find yourself lost in memories of the past but today’s article includes a step by step guide to overcoming loneliness this Christmas.
Not only that, but it will show you how to make the most out of your situation so you can actually enjoy your well-earned season of rest.
12 tips for seasonal singles
1. Focus on yourself
If you’ve recently split from a long term love, or simply crave the connection of a partner then maybe it’s time to focus on yourself for once. Whilst looking back at the good times can comfort you, it distorts your vision of the future…
Concentrate on living each moment and ask yourself; “what do I need to do, right now?” You can’t do anything to change the past or recreate memories, but you can choose your future.
2. Create a life with you in the driver’s seat
Everyone wants something that they don’t have however, the grass is greener syndrome only makes things worse…
Rather than bringing down the happiest time of the year with feelings of jealousy and loneliness, accept your reality and look towards the future. You are in the driver’s seat so take the time to create new traditions, honour yourself and enjoy independence.
3. Don’t hide away in isolation
Hiding doesn’t solve anything, whilst you may not be feeling the Christmas cheer, Christmas is still happening. No, you don’t have to take part in old traditions but suppressing your emotions is never the answer. Emotions that go unacknowledged
can even intensify and cause us to lash out at others unnecessarily.
4. Ask for help when you need it
Asking for help is always a sign of strength, not weakness. Besides, Christmas is the time for coming together! Instead of being in a state of self-pity, let your friends and
family know how you are honestly feeling, and ask for their support or suggestions if you feel you need it. Plus you can always return the favour and embrace the Christmas spirit!
5. Count your blessings
Acknowledging all you have is a fail-proof mood lifter. It can be as simple as being grateful for your free time or appreciating the food in your belly…
Just take some time to recognise the position you are in and ask yourself “what are the benefits to being on my own this year?”
- “I don’t have to argue over who is going to drive.”
- “I don’t have to stress over finding the perfect gift for my partner.”
6. Embrace the Christmas spirit
Relax, get grounded and think about the true meaning of Christmas. Forget the noise, ditch the hype and focus on what truly matters. Fulfilment comes in giving, not taking – especially in the holidays. Plus nothing heals a broken or lonely heart quicker than giving without expecting anything in return. Here are some examples…
- Look at volunteering
- Donate money or gifts
- Lend a hand to family in need
7. Stay away from an office festive fling
When inhibitions are lowered and the energy is heightened, getting swept up in the moment of an office party fling becomes a serious threat to your happiness as a single over the Christmas season…
I get it, you’re craving that connection but an awkward hookup isn’t going to fill that hole… In fact, it can often make things worse. Plus, think about the awkward encounters in the office kitchen! Instead focus on yourself this Christmas.
8. Manage your emotions
One of the hardest things about feeling lonely at Christmas is how much it hurts. Feeling lonely, rejected, guilty, unworthy, angry, used, discarded, betrayed, or a combination of them all…
Whatever the emotion, you must embrace it in order to overcome it. If you’re unsure on how to work through these emotions, try this simple, yet highly effective technique in gaining control of the thoughts and emotions running your mind:
Instead of the random thoughts about your ex, breakup or loneliness coming up throughout the day, schedule an hour every day to give yourself full permission to think and feel. Whenever you find yourself thinking about your ex or being alone, remind yourself of the designated hour you have allocated for these thoughts.
9. Recognise the opportunity for growth
Every experience, positive and negative, is a chance to grow. Life is full of lessons and tests that you cannot control. The only thing you can only control is your reaction to them so what will it be?
You either Accept where you are in life now, balance your mindset and embrace the moment OR…
You stay trapped in a cycle of negativity. Only one option contains your desired outcome so pick wisely.
10. Listen to your heart
When you are lonely and heartbroken it’s easy to fill the hole by pleasing people. But rather than saying yes to every event possible, be selective with your energy and only go to what feels right. Save yourself from stress and use the time to set new habits and learn to express who you truly are without any unnecessary compromise.
11. Get active
Rather than focusing on sculpting the perfect revenge body, put yourself first and exercise for your own mental health. Getting off the couch and into nature is a
proven mood-booster for the lonely or broken-hearted. Find joy in the simple things in life like the beach, sunshine or your pets.
12. Don’t be a desperate dater
Getting under someone to get over someone is not the way to curb loneliness or mend a broken heart over the festive season…
Whilst it might be a fun distraction nothing you ever want or desire will manifest when
you focus on what you don’t have. Use this time to fall in love with your inner self instead.
If you found this overview helpful then download the full free guide here to get all the extra details!
To summarise…
As hard as it may seem to spend Christmas alone, there are countless benefits. Rather than focusing on the dark, make an effort to surround yourself with light, enjoy the Christmas cheer and use it for motivation ready for the new year!
If you are struggling to get over past relationships or need help finding your feet in the modern world of dating then take a look at our brand new 28 day dating challenge. It’s the fastest and easiest way to reset your love life ready to attract your perfect partner.
WISHING YOU LOVE, ALWAYS,
Louanne Ward x
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